Part 121

Guide to achieving 100% completion in Bully: Scholarship Edition, including the Endless Summer chapter and the Majic Moostapholees fortune machine at the Carnival.

The Majic Moostapholees:

At the Carnival, next to the Cotton Candy stand and across from the Souvenir Tent, you'll find the Majic Moostapholees fortune machine. For 25 cents, you can receive one of many fortunes. Below is a comprehensive list of all possible fortunes:

• Good luck. You'll need it.
• If you go camping, beware of evil intent.
• Stay home, read a book.
• Do not throw glasses if you live in a stone house.
• You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
• If you need to get the point, sit on a tack.
• The best marmalade is made from forbidden fruit.
• A house without a toilet is uncanny.
• If you're on high cliff, don't jump to conclusion.
• Isn't it about time you got a job?
• You're wasting your life.
• Consider a career in politics.
• Running behind a car is exhausting.
• If you live in a glass house, change in the basement.
• Two wrongs do not make a right, but 3 lefts do.
• Do not argue with the person packing your parachute.
• When things go wrong, don't follow along.
• Don't forget to change your socks.
• Confession is good for the soul but bad for your reputation.
• Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
• If you put your face in fruit drink, you may get punch in nose.
• To make life interesting, believe everything you hear.
• Consider trying less hard.
• You're a winner. No really. You are.
• Have you considered running away from your problems?
• The smarter you think you are, the less likely it is that you're right.
• Get over yourself. Jerk.
• The answer to your question is: maybe.
• Don't be so self-centered.
• You need a haircut.
• Before you act, check with your mother.
• Get a life.
• Help! I'm trapped inside this machine!
• All signs point to: no chance.
• Just give up.
• You're smart and handsome, just like your mom always says you are.
• If people flatter you they're probably lying.
• Beware of angry men carrying weapons.
• Consider this: no turkey ever voted for an early Christmas.
• Bully is as bully does.
• You're doomed. Sorry.
• Regular showers are a good thing.
• No one likes a whiner.
• Believe the best of everybody. It saves you so much trouble.
• By swallowing evil words unsaid, no one has ever harmed his stomach.
• However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results.
• It is always wise to look ahead, but difficult to look further than you can see.
• What exactly is your problem?
• You're not all that.
• Consider the possibility that no one likes you.
• You might as well keep trying. It might make you feel better.
• If you don't try, you can't fail.
• Travel broadens the mind, if you have one to begin with.
• All signs point to: you suck.
• Surprisingly, you may succeed in the end.
• What you really need is some sort of medication.
• Peeing your own pants only keeps you warm for a short while.
• Bad advice causes mistakes, then laughter.
• You can definitely fool some of the people some of the time.
• If your house is burning you might as well try to stay warm.
• Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes.
• You won't get anywhere if you think you're already there.
• It's a good time to stop waffling. Maybe.
• The weather pays no attention to